I went to the GP surgery this morning to collect my three monthly medication prescription, then to Boots on Cowbridge Road to collect the pills. We needed some prawns and mushrooms for lunch, so I went on to Tesco's, but there was a queue of twenty people waiting for admission to the store, so I went on further to the Co-op, where I walked straight in, bought what a needed, plus a few other things, then headed for home. Our Shrove Tuesday special lunch was pancakes, with a savoury filling, Clare cooked the pancakes and I did the filling - fried mushrooms and an onion plus garlic, prawns and seasonings. Two each, filling a dinner plate. There were two thinner spare ones for sweet. Clare ate hers but I kept mine for supper and filled it with home made hummus, avocado slices and grated vegan cheese. A worthwhile experiment, to be repeated with variations another time!
Although it rained a little in the morning, it was mild again, ten degrees. After lunch, when I went out for a walk the sun shone through the clouds. I did a few circuits of Thomson's Park then headed through the back streets up to the top end of Llandaff Fields, and then back home, enjoying the afternoon sunlight and shadows on the grass. Everyone out in the fresh air seemed to be smiling more and not so turned in on themselves as happens when it's cold wet and windy, which is all we seem to have had in January.
Lent starts tomorrow, and I understand the Bishops have issued instructions about how to perform the rite of Ashing, without physical contact with worshippers in church, and suggestions on how to do it on-line. I confess I haven't bothered to read up on this as I'm not taking a service, and in our parish there is not service to go to, just an on-line liturgy, but I understand it somehow involves self- administered sprinkling of ashes over the head. I find the idea surreal, and utterly disconnected from what is meant to be a visceral physical experience, of having one's forehead smeared with ash to the words remember 'you are but dust'. I think I can do without playing let's pretend games.
I could jump ship so to speak, and go to a church where a Mass is happening live, but I am a parishioner here, first and a priest only when invited. I want to share the same experience of disappointment and deprivation at the reality of churches closed for worship when they needn't be. This experience isn't foreign to lay people at different times in life. It's easy to forget this when you've had the responsibilities and privileges of being a priest for over fifty years. The treasured rites and ceremonies of Catholic tradition have been part and parcel of my life and supported my faith journey for the past sixty years. This year will be different, stripped back to the foundation - scripture, tradition, reason, and the passage of time without add-ons. 'We do not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God'.
At the moment I have no idea what Lenten exercises, if any, I am going to undertake. Much of the past eleven and a half months have felt like Lent, so much time in solitude, vigilant, exercising restraint and praying through the events of each day, though not without distractions, anxiety, boredom. Being back at home, secure and healthy with a degree of domestic routine stability is such a blessing. With far less to do in terms of ministry, it's more difficult to find a sense of meaning in life when I've been so fortunate to be active, even in retirement until now. I could do with a project or two, on which to focus me life creatively but opportunity and inspiration have so far escaped me. I'd rather do something to benefit others than just to satisfy my own needs. All I can do is wait and stay open who whatever emerges I guess.
Yesterday I ordered another batch of the sterile swabs I use for everyday wound dressing. Delivery takes two to three days, no need to pay for fast track 24 hour service. The delivery invoice said delivery will be tomorrow. We were both out walking when the courier van turned up a day early! Fortunately the firm has a local parcel collection point in a convenience store on Clare Road, ten minutes walk from home, and I was able to retrieve my ordered parcel at the end of the deliveryman's round. Impressive service from the supplier FirstAid4Less and the courier DPD.
In the evening, we watched a fascinating programme on BBC Four about excavations of stone age sites in the Orkneys. It's thought that British megalithic culture and stone circle sacred sites originated there and spread south into Scotland, Wales and England. It's amazing the way current technologies and forensics are being applied to uncovering the past, supplying evidence that obliges us to re-think how civilization evolved in the British Isles. This was followed by a programme about Pluscarden Benedictine Monastery in Scotland, continuously in use as a monastery since its foundation in 1230. The monks wear the all white habit of Primitive Observance Benedictines, a sub-group of the family of Benedictines who live by the older more austere version of Benedict's rule which still involves routine subsistence manual labour. It was beautifully done, alluring to watch, but I quite after ten minute and will view the series about monasteries on catch-up, rather than have a late night, and lose much of the morning as a result.
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