Thursday 25 September 2014

Beach wedding

Midweek Eucharist and coffee morning again for me yesterday, and then after siesta time, a rehearsal in St. Andrew's for the blessing of a civil marriage at a beach restaurant outside Marbella. Accompanying the bride and groom were more than a dozen family and friends. They arrived three quarters of an hour late, as the wedding organiser had not anticipated all those with some kind of role in the ceremony, active or passive, would want to be ferried to Los Boliches from Marbella. 

When we got started, it transpired the civil marriage certificate had been left behind in Britain, despite several admonitions to be sure to bring it along. The blessing of a civil marriage cannot proceed unless there is proof that the wedding has taken place. Nobody seemed to 'get it', least of all, bride and groom, who seemed to be in a daze about everything. I insisted the blessing couldn't take place unless evidence was provided that a marriage had taken place. It was agreed that the couple would contact a neighbour holding their house key, retrieve the certificate and email photographs to the wedding arranger in time for the ceremony to take place.

I woke up at half past five fretting: 'What if ...?, trying to figure out a fall back plan that would depend on civil ceremony witnesses being present in Spain for the wedding blessing. If the photos didn't turn up, I could get witnesses and the couple to sign a declaration that a civil wedding had taken place in a certain place and on a certain date, then I might proceed with confidence. On the face of it, the couple had made a simple foolish error. But how could I be sure, given the church had little direct contact with the couple during the preparation. Such is the nature of wedding blessings often organised by third party professionals. 

There was no reason to believe they would all lie to secure a church blessing without a civil marriage, but such things have occurred in times past. Now in a world where fake marriages and marriages of convenience are increasingly common the church is obliged to follow its procedures diligently for the sake of its trusted role and for the sake of the couple putting their trust in the church's ministry, even if they don't yet fully understand the significance of the public as well as personal commitment involved in making marriage.

Lunchtime today we were still waiting to receive photographic confirmation of the civil marriage, the best that could be done to secure the ceremony went ahead. Only as I was setting out did the awaited email arrive, two hours before the appointed time. The photos, taken last night, six of them, were all embedded in one message, big enough to stall the series of email clients through which it passed to reach Linda, eventually, just in time.

There were about sixty guests at the wedding, most of them had flown out from Britain to attend. The venue was a beach restaurant on the edge of the golden sands of Alcate Playa.
Chairs were arranged on the beach around a small platform with a table, a parasol, and chairs for the bridal couple right on the beach, just five metres from the water's edge.
A guitarist was hired to provide accompaniment to the ceremony, a teacher at the Marbella guitar academy, not too far away. We chatted beforehand, as I'd done with the guitarist at the previous Saturday wedding blessing I performed, but this time with a bit more confidence. 
Conditions were perfect, cool clear, a slight breeze. After I'd welcomed the congregation and settled the bride and groom into their places, the sound of the guitar duetting with waves breaking on the shore provided a perfect moment of serenity from which to move into the blessing liturgy. 

It's the first time I've ever taken a service of any kind on a beach. I was tempted to take off my sandals, but was reluctant to draw attention to myself in such a smartly dressed crowd. I marvel at how some of the women coped on the sand wearing high heels. Despite the awkwardness of such an exposed situation, it wasn't difficult to draw on the sense of place to make the liturgy memorable for everyone involved, yet it's the first time I've done this in forty four years of ministry. Nice to know new challenges to pastoral creativity still exist.

I've never had any qualms about taking the ministry of prayer and blessing to places away from church sanctuaries, but in the past it's been the exception rather than the rule. Going to where people who aren't that religious want to be, but regard as special for them, is a relatively new dimension for Anglican ministers. In the past we've relied on the attractiveness of our church buildings to bring people to us for blessing. Changing social and religious attitudes challenge us to offer ministry wherever people want to be, rather than where we think they ought to be. I can't say that I don't have misgivings about this, it's not always easy to rise to the challenge, but it does mean there's never a dull moment in God' service after all these years.
  

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