No response

I had a terrible night's sleep. Each time I got up to empty my bladder I began to feel anxious about the hospital appointment I was facing at midday, to wear a blood pressure monitor for a day. It was a stressful uncomfortable experience last time, and I'm not sure what was gained from it anyway.

An email reply from the dental receptionist arrived telling me to phone for an appointment, though the reason I had emailed was because I had tried phoning twice and got no response. It was third time lucky however. I now have a checkup booked in a month's time.

Clare's study group arrived at ten. I was still feeling exhausted, and came to the conclusion that getting myself to UHW and subjecting myself to this procedure would only make me feel worse. I discussed this with group members and decided to call the cardiology unit to say I wasn't feeling well. I tried the two different contact numbers given for the cardiology unit and got no response. I couldn't even leave a message, so I rang the main switchboard and also got no response. I wrote a letter to the consultant explaining what happened and posted it first class mail before lunch. 

My anxiety dissipated and I slept soundly for an hour after eating, though brain fatigue dulled my senses and made me feel a little unsteady on my feet. I have a surgery appointment booked on Thursday this week for a blood test and blood pressure check in any case, a follow up on the mini-crisis in Tenby. In the end, I'm the only person who can protect me from exhaustion and getting over stressed. If it means saying 'No' to a medical system which makes exacting and complex demands on time and energy, and accused of being an uncooperative patient, so be it.

I walked to Thompson's Park, under a sky filled with fast moving clouds driven by a strong wind. Rain was threatened in the forecast but there was none. I counted five moorhen offspring, almost as big as their parents but not fully fledged around the weed strewn big pond. Sadly, I had left my camera at home. I only stayed out for half an hour, as I found the gusts of wind unnerving. When my senses aren't sharp as normal I'm instinctively cautious. Better safe than sorry. I walked again for nearly an hour before supper, hoping to clear my dulled senses with fresh air and exercise. I just wish I could get more rest.