Friday 13 August 2021

Recovering from lockdown

A necessarily early start today, with the car to deliver to NG Motors in Splott by eight thirty for a service and MOT test. Fortunately the traffic was lighter than I expected, so I was on my way back home on foot by a quarter to nine, walking across the city centre as far as Westgate Street, to catch a bus for the rest of the way. A round trip of an hour, with three quarters of an hour to spare before going to the surgery for a blood test and blood pressure reading. Thankfully, it's not as high now as it was a couple of weeks ago, even after a couple of demanding days plus an early start after a late bed time.

I've been pondering on what leads to a period when my blood pressure seems to surge frighteningly for a prolonged period. Just before we went to Aberaeron I had a demanding week with three funerals in two days. We had a lovely relaxing week there, but it was our first outing under covid since last summer. Then two weeks after returning we had our family gathering in Oxwich, again relaxing and enjoyable, no really unusual demands or stress. Both outings represented a substantial change from our habitual daily routine over a period of a year, and the underlying adjustment required, getting used to something different, may well be a source of hidden stress. Now that most restrictions are lifted, we're having to adjust to greater freedom in using our time from day to day. We have a greater choice of habit, something to get used to, like a prisoner in the time after release. Being older, adjustment takes longer.

I was aware yesterday, driving to Weston for the first time in several years of being slightly nervous at first but the longer I spent behind the wheel, the more relaxed as well as alert I became. Taking Owain back to Redfield in Bristol rush hour was pretty demanding, but by then I was into my fourth hour of driving and had adjusted to stop start traffic and changing lanes with increasing ease. I'd expected to be exhausted and tense by the time we got home but I wasn't. I went for a late walk and slept well, though not long enough. 

It's a matter of adjustment, reclaiming from mind and body memory old patterns of behaviour learned half a century ago, but unused for a couple of years. I remember a similar experience of adjusting to the change when getting into a car after arriving from UK in Spain. The steering wheel is on the opposite side of the car, and you drive on the other side and you look in different directions for safety checks. It's almost fifty years since I first drove abroad, long before living abroad. Swapping between UK and EU was un-nerving anf challenging initially, but adjustment to the change gets easier once you have both habits. Stress in the face of change may be inevitable. The more you change it seems the easier it gets, as happens when when exercising physically, it wakes time to warm up physically and move at optimum efficiency. The same with the brain.

After the surgery visit, I dropped in on Emma for coffee and a chat. It's the first opportunity we've had to catch up face to face for ages. He two small children are a delight to watch at play around the house, even if they clash and cry and need a cuddle from Mum, Dad or Grandpa. They're both very active, and a day of intermittent showers confines them to the house, which is frustrating for them, especially when the big people are preoccupied and busy. The family are getting their first proper holiday together since Eleanor was born next week. Thank heavens, they deserve it.

I spent the afternoon working on next week's Morning Prayer assignment, so I don't have to do anything but upload it while we're away in Felixstowe with Ann. Then, this evening we watching the recording of Wednesday's live performance from memory of Stravinsky's 'Firebird' suite by the Aurora ensemble. It was beautiful to watch, emotionally powerful, filled with resurrection vitality. In a word - thrilling. 

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