State of Alarm - day Seventy

Slowly the pain subsides, but the swelling diminishes more slowly. There's a lot of nasty fluid to be discharged yet. I worry about it and wonder if I should return to Urgencias and ask to be examined again. I wish I could do something about my high anxiety level. It's bearable if I have work to focus on, preparing for Sunday, but sometimes I am just too tired to be busy. I try to sleep, and normally I can relax deeply in 26C heat, but not now.

I was able, despite the discomfort in sitting, able to craft an Gospel Alleluia acclamation and Psalm 150, using texts recorded by herself in German, and her ancient local parish priest, in Castellano and Ibiceno, the local dialect. I was surprised and delighted at the outcome. Given my state of mind I expected this task to be hard labour, but somehow it wasn't. The Lord and all those people praying for me kept me going, doubtless.

Talking of which I had a message from one of the Ty Mawr sisters to tell me I had been prayed for at Evensong the night before. Associates and Oblate's names are each written down on an origami paper crane kept in a basket on the chapel altar. Each night one is drawn to be prayed for. It couldn't  be more timely.

Amazingly my sister Pauline is still alive, conscious and conversing, even talking about a return to home in Weston when she recovers. She's a strong spirit, accepting that her time is near, yet glad to be given a few days extra time. We may speak again, but will I ever see her again in this life?

At teatime, Jayne called by with groceries and pills I'd asked her to get for me. I can't drive if I can't sit down. Such a nuisance, but I am so grateful for her help.

Before bed Ashley called, we haven;t chatted for more than a week. It was Julie our Secretary, who reads this blog (hello Julie!), who alerted him to the downturn in my condition. It's lovely when friends write or call, and therapeutic to respond to talk with them, except that it leaves me fighting off exhaustion, I don't understand why.

State of Alarm - day Sixty Eight

I work up yesterday after more than ten hours of sleep, aware that painful swelling had developed in the muscles close to the wound, with my head still foggy and hurting. This confirmed the worst fear which I had when I arrived at Can Misses yesterday. It was just the way I felt when things went bad for me in Montreux two years ago, Maybe there was nothing for the examining doctor to feel or see. There is now. I spent the day lying down or walking around the house to check if it was changing. No chance of being about to sit down.

In the evening, Jayne drove me to the Urgencias in St Antoni, and the doctor who examined me soon realised the truth of what I was saying. He gave me a week's course of antibiotics also some pain killers. By ten thirty I was back at the house, eating a nice dish of veggie pasta which Jayne thoughtfully brought with her.

I slept, and as ever I woke up several times, each time my head was clearer and ached less, evidence that the antibiotics were starting to work. The wound leaked nasty looking fluid and hurt horribly. It might have been even worse without the pain killer I took before sleeping. After ten hours in bed, I got up and had breakfast, grateful to have physical strength and a clearer head. The main thing now is to be very disciplined about taking the pills and doing enough gentle exercise to help the muscle to expel the rest of its nasty payload.